Friday, February 18, 2011

Are You a Good Programmer/Developer?

Well, this is not a technical question its more about your personality and if you have what it takes to become a programmer. Let me put my criteria and see if you fit within this criteria, otherwise you should find another career :-)

  • Do you smoke? If yes then thats a good start, most of the programmers and geeks are smokers

  • Do you like to deal with people? If yes, then be a salesman, programmers don't usually like to deal with people they prefer the cyber world and try to avoid humans, they prefer the computers over humans

  • Do you like computer games? If yes, then you have what it takes to become a programmer who knows how to spend his free time
  • Do you judge on things by emotions or logic? If you are a logical person then thats a good sign to become a programmer (thats why you cannot find lots of female programmers)
  • Do you enjoy challenges? If yes, then you are a good material to become a programmer, you will not get paid that much, if you are looking for money, then again be a salesman
  • Are you lazy? This is one of the most important qualities in a good programmer, if you are active and athletic then most probably you should become a salesman
  • Can you express yourself without drawing a diagram? If yes, then you need to think of finding another job, most programmers cannot deliver their messages without drawing something
  • When you communicate with people technically, do they understand you? If yes, then be a salesman, programmers have their own jargons and they enjoy using them and seeing others unable to understand them
  • Do you read technical material and articles frequently? If no, then you should open a supermarket and leave IT
  • Did you hear of Linux yet? If not, then stay at home and cook for the children instead of going to work in an IT company
  • Do you know object-oriented? No => cook
  • Do you want a job that ends with the official work hours? Yes => work in a governmental institute, actually your job then starts after one hour (drink tea, socialize and having breakfast) and ends one hour earlier
  • Can you motivate yourself? If no and you always look for something or someone to motivate you then => Salesman
  • Are a team player? If yes, then you are pretending to be a programmer, usually good programmers are not good team players but they know how to deal with it
  • Do you adapt fast? Have you ever and suddenly decided to go to Aqaba without even having the needed stuff, if yes then you can be a good programmer
  • Do you work under pressure? The funny thing is that everyone mentions in their CVs that they can handle pressure and once you start squeezing them they start to collapse and cry just like a lemon. Programmers who can handle the pressure actually can be squeezed and squeezed and you will only see them saying more until they crash
  • Do you obey orders or do you discuss them first? If you are just obeying orders then you are not a good programmer, programmers usually likes to challenge what they are asked to do and try to find a better way from their point of view, now thats good if you can balance otherwise you will end up being a good programmer without a job
  • Do you respect highly skilled people? If yes, then you might become a good programmer but to really become a good programmer you should also look up to them and to become like them and reach a point to challenge them
  • Do you have more courage when dealing with people using the cyber world than direct and face-to-face? If yes, then you will become a good programmer
  • Do you have daydreams? If yes, then you are a good material to become a programmer. Programmers usually do not like their current reality and dreams of something better and different
  • Do you have enough curiosity that will make you question how this works or why is this needed? If yes, then thats a very important thing, to become a good programmer that you always question things, designs or methodologies and try to know why? How? When? Where? and What?
Programmers or developers are the heroes behind the scenes that are paid less but they do most of the work but they always look for the next new thing and they might get bored quickly, really good programmers or developers are self motivated, they find something to motivate them, if they cannot find it, they create it, if they cannot create it, they illude themselves with one and they believe in it, otherwise there is nothing else that can motivate them, they work day and night, they read, they need to be up to date, they need to keep up with the team, handle issues, work under pressure, burn lots of brain cells, become anti-social to take only their salaries and maybe some credit or little appreciation while others (management and/or sales) will take all the credit and accordingly the bonus, the good salary raises, etc ...


Anonymous said...

Baba saksoook! it's so great to find your blog man.. you made me laugh hard with this one. I have to admit that in your definition I was a very good programmer but I worked very hard to get myself out of it :) dont ask why

P.S. love the Cigar! let's get together over some cubans when I'm back


Anonymous said...

by other words , developers === ant